gosh, where do i start?

we had to do something terribly sad today. 
something i hope i never have to do again.

remember how lincoln's family lives in oklahoma?

well, we have been taking care of their cat, allie, while they are gone.

yesterday we went over to their house to check on allie, but we couldn't find her.
she's an outside cat and sometimes is off hunting.

so we went back today to check on her...
lincoln found her in the garage laying there moaning.
he called me in a panic.

luckily, i was just getting off work when this happened, so i called the vet, ran and got lincoln, and we took her right in.

she couldn't walk and we were terrified.
i thought she may have gotten hit by the car.

luckily our vet is a good family friend and he was right there when we arrived.

he examined her and thought maybe she had a back injury and that's why she wasn't walking,
so they did an x-ray.

structurally she was fine.
so he did a blood test...

he came back and said he's never seen a blood test like her's and said it was completely full of white blood cells.


heart break.

basically, we could treat her and make her comfortable for a while longer.
or let her go.

she was getting old and the decision was made to let her go.

keep in mind, lincoln and i are the only ones in our family left here in utah.

allie is 13 years old.
same as rusty.

in a matter of three hours, we found out she had leukemia and said our final goodbyes.

we are so terribly sad.
it's absolutely devastating to lose a pet.
lots of tears and swollen eyes over here today.

she was such a sweet little lady.

we sat with her for the last half hour of her life, petted her and kissed her head.

and we were there when she passed.

we buried her in the backyard and marked her grave.

love her.
and she will be deeply missed by our family.


Anonymous said...

This made me cry! I'm so sorry to hear about her :(

kristin said...

you poor thing. i'm so sorry. losing pets is so so awful. i can't imagine having to sit there with her for the last few minutes of her life. ugh. at least she didn't have to suffer in pain for too long. and you'll see her in heaven, you know. i'm so sorry. :(

geri e. said...

Oh no! That is so hard.

Anonymous said...

This is so very sad!An awful thing to go through.Pets are family,and I have 4 cats myself,so I'm sitting here at work,bawling my eyes out on your behalf.At least she had a wonderful life with people who loved her,and had you to comfort her at the end.Hope you feel better soon!

Brandon and Vanessa said...

I'm sorry about your cat, I can't even imagine... I have two dogs and they are my babies. I don't know what I'll do when they pass.

Jess said...

Oh that is so sad, i am so sorry to hear that!
Seeing that photo of you saying good bye to Allie is so sad it even made me cry.

Anna said...

This made me cry at work. The thought of losing my pets is unbearable. I am so sorry!

Robby Spratt said...

I'm sorry Jalene. Saying goodbye to pets is so hard. The only thing I have found to be comforting is to think back on all the love they unconditionally gave, and all the happiness they provided. Pets are really special.

Chess said...

I have lost many a kitty, and it never gets easier. I'm so glad you have your own to help heal that hurt!

Erin Marie said...

Oh, Jalene. I am now sobbing. I know how hard it is to lose a pet. Thank you for sharing, prayers and thoughts your way!

katrina said...

jalene! that picture is so sad. im so so sorry.

L!$@ said...

So sad :'( That picture of you two is just devastating! Hope you are feeling better soon.

Anonymous said...

So sorry for your loss. I am a kitty Mommy to and I love them all so much. So sad when we have to say goodbye so soon!

whimsy said...

oh my gosh! so sad!!! im so sorry!!

Masha said...

Being someone who remembers what she was doing when finding out that their beloved cat has passed on really can empathize. Here's to hoping you'll always remember the good times and that the Angel is now in a place without pain and full of happiness. Thank you for sharing such a personal moment. Sending you lotsa love from me and my kitty, Kiska!

sarah said...


so sad to read, especially when i knew the ending already!!

i am so sorry you and lincoln had to do that all alone!

it is hard to lose pets.